Gabbar – Osteofighter!

Yesterday morning, we brought Gabbar’s ashes home. And we are slowly and gradually understanding that he is with us. His body had trouble and in his last few hours, I got a very clear sense that he was very much there, thriving, but trapped inside a body that was failing. He was struggling to get out, and I could see that as he struggled to keep his eyes open. And then he just finally broke his way out of that body and became free. He’s around us, but unfortunately with the limitations of our own bodies, we just cannot see him in a physical form that we are used to. But we feel him. And that gives us comfort.

Suzy keeps showing us the way forward, how to get on with life, just keep going and enjoy every moment. And she keeps showing us that he’s here. I posted that bit about his toy last morning. Yesterday evening, I grabbed the same toy and started playing fetch with her as my wife and my parents sat in the living room, just doing their thing. She fetched the toy and brought it back to me a couple of times. And then the third time, instead of giving it to me, she went straight to that specific part of the living room where Gabbar breathed his last, and carefully placed it on the floor over there, and quietly moved to the other side of the room and lay down. That same point in the room was also one of Gabbar’s favourite napping and chilling spots. We all just watched, with goosebumps. It was almost as if she was dropping it in front of him saying, “Ok bro. Your turn.” The reason this was shocking is that she never does this. She never drops a toy off at a specific place. She would usually take it back with her, and lay down next to it. And then after sometime, she may walk away without the toy. But never drop it somewhere and walk away. She’s our link to Gabbar. She can sense his presence and guide us to it.

This morning, we took Suzy to the vet, and did a thorough health checkup on her. In the last few months, we have been so engrossed in Gabbar that we have completely ignored her. We did X-Rays, blood tests etc. She had a couple of lumps on her rear thighs from a few months ago, which the doctor had said were just Lipomas (harmless fat deposits). But now, everything scares us. We had him test samples just for safety. Thankfully, she’s clear. Just some measures to be taken to get a few things under control. But overall. she’s in decent health.

A lot of people have been messaging me recommending we adopt another dog, at least for Suzy’s sake. We are not ready to adopt another dog yet. There is still a long way to go for us as well as Suzy to heal. There were so many plans we made and experiences we wished to have with Gabbar and Suzy. A lot of incomplete work. And for us to heal, we first have to set out on a quest to fulfil all those plans. Create some wonderful memories between the three of us.

Down the line we will of course reach a place where we will open our hearts and home to another dog. We don’t know when that will be. But it will be for that kid that nobody else wants to take home. That kid that needs a special kind of love and care. A senior dog, a differently abled dog, a dog that needs a special level of understanding. And when the time is right, we will know. When that dog comes before us, we will know. Gabbar himself will tell us.